Anticipation

Well, here we are- in the home stretch of this pregnancy and preparing to meet our boy any day now. Everyone keeps asking me how I am feeling and each time they do, that old Carly Simon song “Anticipation” pops into my head. That is the name of the game these days- waiting, hoping, wishing, praying, anticipating. My friend Erin once shared the below eCard on Instagram and I remember chuckling at the time and now let me just say that I GET IT. This is spot on!

Last week (just shy of 38 weeks) I was awoken in the middle of the night by a contraction for the first time. I have been getting Braxton Hicks for a while now, and this was definitely a very different sensation than the tight, tense feeling of a Braxton Hicks. This one took my breath away and felt like a combination of a bad menstrual cramp and intense back pain with the sharpness of a gas pain and a general sense of pressure in the pelvis. I definitely understood quickly the need for learning about breathing techniques in baby classes, and I was immediately thankful that we spent time doing that so that Bryan can coach me through contractions when they’re coming hot and heavy. I woke Bryan up, and we timed them- just in case- but ultimately I was able to go back to sleep. After calling to check in with the nurse the next morning, I learned that this is prodromal labor, and basically means I will likely get random contractions here and there until actual labor comes. They have come each day since then, mostly waking me up in the middle of the night, but then they leave just as suddenly as they come. I am actually thankful for these contractions as I was worried that I wouldn’t be able to distinguish between a Braxton Hicks and a labor contraction. They feel completely different… and maybe once I actually go into labor I will look back and laugh thinking that these preview contractions were nothing like the real thing either. But for now, I feel at ease knowing that I will be able to identify when I am feeling something more than a Braxton Hicks.

We have a doctor appointment tomorrow afternoon where they’ll check my cervix for the first time to see if I am dilated at all. We will likely schedule an ultrasound for the following week (around 39.5 weeks) to check on Liam’s weight. He will definitely be a big boy! Once we see how big he is next week (assuming he hasn’t come by then) we will talk through options with our midwife to ensure that we’re aware of all of our choices and the risks associated with each. It’s definitely our preference to wait until he is ready to come on his own, and we are hopeful that that will be the case. But, I do want to be educated on the downside of him getting too big and potentially not dropping or risking being injured on his way out. Inducing is not my first option, but I also want to do what is best for Liam at the end of the day. The good news is we are now with a practice where we don’t feel pressured one way or the other, and I am nervous but also believe in Bryan’s and my ability to make the right decision for our son. It is hard when there is no black and white, right or wrong way to proceed, though. I guess we can count this as practice for the many times in the future where there is no guide book on parenting, and Bryan and I have to trust in our gut and in each other that we will make the right call for our little family.

On Sunday, there will be a Super Moon- the largest full moon of the year, and Bryan and I have plans to go to Scalini’s for dinner and order their famous labor-inducing eggplant parmesan. I am crossing my fingers that the combination of these two old wives tales may just be enough to trigger labor. But if not, it sounds like a fun date night anyway!